Couples Therapy in New York City
I help couples in New York — including partners whose lives are lived partly in public — rebuild trust, communication, and connection using the Gottman Method.
Couples therapy — scope at a glance
The couples I work with are often the last people you'd expect to be struggling.
• Couples navigating the strain a public or high-profile life puts on privacy and trust
• Two high-achievers whose careers keep crowding out the relationship
• Partners at a crossroads — considering whether to recommit or move on
The Gottman Method — structure, and honesty.
My couples work is grounded in the Gottman Method, one of the most researched, evidence-based approaches to relationships. It gives our work a clear structure — assessing where things stand, then building communication, trust, and repair. But method is only half of it. Couples stay with me because I’m willing to name what’s really happening in the room, gently and honestly, and hold both partners to the change they say they want.
Who this work is for.
How the Gottman work unfolds.
Assessment
The work
Shared meaning
What patients are saying on Zocdoc
See all reviews on Zocdoc →
Nicole Trister, LCSW
From couples I've worked with.
Couples therapy in New York — FAQ
How do we know if couples therapy is right for us?
Couples therapy is a good fit if you’re wanting to rebuild trust, strengthen your friendship, and reconnect with each other — whether that connection feels frayed emotionally, physically, or both. Often the two are intertwined: when emotional closeness suffers, physical intimacy tends to follow, and vice versa. Most couples who are motivated to understand each other better and repair their bond can benefit from this work. The main exceptions are situations involving domestic violence or ongoing infidelity, which typically need to be addressed before couples work can be safe and effective. If you’re unsure whether it’s the right time, a consultation is a good place to start.
What can we expect in a first session?
The first session is about getting to know you both and understanding your relationship from each of your perspectives. I’ll walk through a set of questions with each of you, exploring your own interpretations of things like what drew you to each other and why you fell in love, what you each see as the biggest challenge in the relationship and how you’ve tried to solve it so far, and the rituals or routines you share as a couple. Hearing both of your viewpoints helps me understand not just the issues you’re facing, but the strengths and history you’re building on. It’s a chance for me to learn about you — and often, for you to hear each other in a new way.
Do both partners need to attend every session?
Early in our work together, I’ll offer each partner an individual session so I can understand your personal history and the experiences you each bring to the relationship — the things that shape how you show up with one another. Apart from those two individual sessions, couples therapy works best when both partners attend together, ideally physically in the same room. Being in the same space allows us to work with what unfolds between you in real time, which is often where the most meaningful progress happens.
What is the Gottman Method, and how do you use it?
The Gottman Method is a relational model developed by Drs. John and Julie Gottman, grounded in decades of research on what makes relationships work. It uses a range of strategies designed to build trust, admiration, friendship, and the ability to see things from your partner’s perspective. In practice, it helps both partners truly listen to one another while affirming that both viewpoints are valuable — so that rather than trying to “win,” you’re working together to understand each other and find middle ground. I draw on this approach to help couples move from feeling stuck and opposed to feeling like a team.
What kinds of issues do you work with couples on?
I work with couples on a wide range of concerns — from finances and major life decisions like whether to have children or relocate, to differences in parenting values and the everyday logistics of running a household, like dividing chores. I also help couples change unhealthy conflict patterns, including working with what the Gottman Method calls the “Four Horsemen” — criticism, defensiveness, contempt, and stonewalling — and rebuild after infidelity. There aren’t many topics that are off limits; if it matters to your relationship, it’s worth bringing in.
Can couples therapy help if we're unsure about staying together?
Yes. Uncertainty about the future of a relationship is one of the most common places couples begin, and it’s something we can work with directly. Together we can explore what’s underneath the ambivalence — what’s keeping it going, and how staying in that in-between place may be keeping you both stuck. Couples therapy offers a space to name and work through the issues driving that uncertainty, so that the ambivalence can start to move — toward a renewed shared commitment, or toward clarity about separate paths. Either way, the goal is to help you move forward with more understanding rather than staying stuck in limbo.
How long does couples therapy typically take?
The length of treatment varies from couple to couple, because it depends on what the relationship needs. Some couples are working to heal old wounds or rebuild trust that’s been broken, while others are focused on shifting communication patterns and moving past the “Four Horsemen.” How quickly progress unfolds also depends on how open both partners are to trying new approaches and repairing together. In terms of format, my sessions are typically 45 minutes, though some couples prefer 60-minute sessions, and others choose to meet twice a week for added accountability and a faster pace of repair. We’ll find a rhythm that fits your goals and your relationship.
If you're ready to do the honest work together, let's talk.
Consultations are held privately and by inquiry.